Mornin' Mail

The Mornin' Mail is published every weekday except major holidays
Monday, August 10, 2009 Volume XVIII, Number 36

Did Ya Know?... On August 11th there will be a Grief Support Group from 1:30 to 3 PM in the McCune Brooks Felix Wright Family Chapel. Free & open to the public. For info, call 417-359-AMEN.

Did Ya Know?... Freeman will be having an Alzheimer’s Support Group on August 11th from 6-7 PM in their East Conf. Room. For info, call 417-347-4029.

Did Ya Know?... The Family Literacy Center will be selling Mums for the fall season at $10 each. To order, call 358-5926.

today's laugh

The preacher buys a parrot

A preacher is buying a parrot.

"Are you sure it doesn’t scream, yell, or swear?" asked the preacher.

"Oh absolutely. It’s a religious parrot," the storekeeper assures him.

"Do you see those strings on his legs? When you pull the right one, he recites the lord’s prayer, and when you pull on the left he recites the 23rd Psalm."

"Wonderful!" says the preacher, "but what happens if you pull both strings?"

"I fall off my perch, you stupid fool!" screeched the parrot.

-Never ask two questions in a business letter. The reply will discuss the one you are least interested in, and say nothing about the other.

1908
INTERESTING MELANGE.
A Chronological Record of Events as they have Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.

Miss Gladden Shows New Fruit.

"Wonderberries" Are Being Grown by Edward Bell.

Miss Alice Gladden called at the Press office this afternoon and showed some "Wonderberries," a new fruit produced by Luther Burbank, the "wizard of horticulture." Miss Gladden said that she had seen a statement in a local paper that the only Wonderberries in this neighborhood are owned by George Briggle, but she added that the fruit in her possession was from vines owned by Edward Bell of Grant street. Mr. Bell has three long rows of vines and finds that they bear very prolifically.

The berries are said to have been evolved from the cherry, but look more like grapes, both in color and in the manner of their clustering. They are practically tasteless, but when cooked it is said that they make excellent jelly and pastry.

Today's Feature

Attorney General Koster Unveils

Spanish Language Website.

Jefferson City, Mo. -– Attorney General Chris Koster has unveiled Missouri state government’s first bilingual website.

"I’m delighted to be able to make government services more accessible to this growing segment of the state’s population," Koster said. "Those for whom English is not a first language will now have an avenue to speak clearly to state government when reporting consumer complaints and the growing problem of mortgage fraud. And they will be able to clearly understand information we provide about their rights as consumers."

Koster also announced today his commitment to maintaining Spanish-speaking employees answering the Attorney General’s Consumer Protection hotline. As many as two dozen complaints per week come into the Attorney General’s office in Spanish.

Koster firmly asserted that his office’s Spanish language website complies with the English-only provision to the Missouri Constitution that voters adopted in 2008.

"When voters adopted the English-only provision to the constitution last year, they made clear that government business, including discussions and roll call votes, be conducted in English," Koster said. "Nonetheless, it is vital that individuals with limited English-language skills have an avenue to report crime, fraud and abuse to our state’s law-enforcement community."

Koster said the public can access the Spanish language version of the Attorney General’s Office website, ago.mo.gov, by clicking on "en espanol" at the top of the page.

Just Jake Talkin'
Mornin',

A friend a mine in high school pointed out to me the "free"energy that is produced by a car heater. ‘Course it ain’t ‘xactly free, but it is a captured by-product of the act of drivin’ a car.

The heat from an engine is gonna happen whether it gets put through a heater or thrown off into the atmosphere. The trick is just a matter of puttin’ the energy to use in a positive way rather than lettin’ it fritter away in the wind.

Like a lot of solutions, a car heater was prob’ly obvious to a lotta folks, but someone with a little insight actually put it to use for the first time. Too bad we can’t readily identify more of those simple answers to capture and utilize random sources of wasted effort.

This is some fact, but mostly,

Just Jake Talkin’

Weekly Columns

THIS IS A HAMMER

By Samantha Mazzotta

Patching Plaster Walls

Q: At my mom’s house -- an older home built in the early 1900s -- one of the bedroom walls upstairs has a small hole, perhaps from being struck by a piece of furniture or something. It looks like plaster rather than drywall, and the wood strips visible through the hole look fine. Are there any special considerations when patching? -- P.A., via e-mail

A: The main consideration in plaster patching is the size of the hole, which dictates the type of repair and, if not done properly, can result in a poorly bonded patch.

A very small ding or hole in a plaster wall can usually be filled with a lightweight spackle. Smooth and let the spackle dry for a day, then sand lightly with fine sandpaper, brush off, prime and paint to match the rest of the wall.

If the hole is larger, or deep enough to see the lath supports (the wooden strips behind the plaster), you’ll want to use patching plaster for the best coverage. You also should consider using a latex bonding liquid to strengthen the patch, as plaster and lath can be a bit temperamental.

First, brush or scrape away loose plaster and prod the area around the hole to see if there is any soft plaster. A little soft or broken plaster around the edges is OK, but if you observe a bigger area of softened or cracked plaster, call a professional.

Once the hole is cleared, mix up the patching plaster well. Then brush a coat of the latex bonding liquid around the edges of the hole and over the wooden lath. Use a putty or wallboard knife to apply a coat of patching plaster into the hole. Don’t slather in the plaster -- use too much and it won’t dry properly, causing the patch to crumble later.

If one application of patching plaster doesn’t completely fill the hole, don’t worry. Scratch a crosshatch pattern into the first application, to set up an improved bonding area for the next coat. Let the application dry. Then, apply a second coat of plaster, smoothing it flush with the wall. Let the patch dry completely before sanding smooth, priming and painting.

HOME TIP: Small cracks in plaster walls can be reinforced with mesh wallboard tape. Spackle over the tape, sand, prime and paint to match the rest of the wall.