today's
laugh A
family of three tomatoes were walking downtown one day
when the little baby tomato started lagging behind. The
big father tomato walks back to the baby tomato, stomps
on her, squashing her into a red paste, and says,
"Ketchup!"
A customer was bothering the waiter in
a restaurant. First, he asked that the air conditioning
be turned up because he was too hot, then he asked it be
turned down cause he was too cold, and so on for about
half an hour.
Surprisingly, the waiter was very
patient, he walked back and forth and never once got
angry. So finally, a second customer asked him why he
didnt throw out the pest.
"Oh, I really dont care or
mind," said the waiter with a smile. "We
dont even have an air conditioner."
1899
INTERESTING MELANGE.
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
WOOLEN MILL RUNNING
Starts Up This Week
to Fill Some Pressing Orders.
The Carthage woolen mill started up
this morning to work up some necessary colors to fill out
pressing orders that have crowded in on the company since
the shut down two weeks ago. Half the force is working
and will be employed all the rest of this week. Thirty
looms and other machinery in proportion are in operation.
At the same time the necessary
repairing is being as quickly done as possibly, and next
Monday an insurance boiler inspector will be here to
inspect the mill boilers. By the first of September Supt.
Baker expects to have all repairing done and be ready to
start the mill going on the usual full time for the
winter.
Mrs. Don C. Hamilton entertained the
"Dewey Club" yesterday afternoon at her home on
Main Street. The next social function will be a trolley
party to Joplin.
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Today's Feature DAY of CARING
The Carthage Area United Way
has set Friday, May 15, 2009 for the 9th Annual
Day of Caring. Volunteers will spend half the day
or more performing much-needed tasks for the
non-profit agencies of the Carthage Area United
Way.
"This day is an exciting
way to involve many different people in the
spirit of volunteerism in our community,"
said Carthage United Way Executive Director Jenny
Mansfield. "It also provids first-hand
experience with the programs of our non-profit
agencies who are helping many families in various
ways throughout the year. Activities will take
place at designated agency locations throughout
our area. The tasks vary from painting,
landscaping and cleaning, as well as assisting
with activities with preschoolers and much
more."
The following agencies will be
receiving volunteer help; Ozark Boy Scout camp,
Girl Scout camp, Salvation Army, CP Center,
Carthage Crisis Center, American Red Cross and
the Lafayette House
CW&EP, SMB Bank, Arvest
Bank, UMB Bank, Hometown Bank, Schreiber and
Barrister Title are sponsors.
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Just Jake
Talkin'
Mornin',
I dont suppose that I
should be surprised. It just seems odd to me
to see what I have always called a
garden tractor that probly
moves at a whoppin five or six miles
per hour tops, bein designed to look
like its goin a hunderd and ten.
In fact, Ive never
seen a ridin mower actually used as a
tractor in the traditional sense,
pullin a little plow or little disk. I
suppose there are some bein used for
heaver tasks than mowin, but they are
mainly just big grass cutters.
I still like the old
fashioned ridin machines that cut a
wide swath and looks like its tractor
namesake. Lots of engine and tires with a
comfortable seat. All of it out in the open
where you can see the workins. Who
would wanna cover up a beauty like a Briggs
and Straton?
This is some fact, but
mostly,
Just Jake Talkin.
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Sponsored by
Carthage Printing
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Weekly Columns Heres A Tip
By JoAnn Derson
Use a window squeegee to
remove hair from compacted carpets or upholstery.
"Nail-polish
remover can remove burned-on plastic from the top
of a toaster oven. If youve ever forgotten
to remove the bread bag, you can appreciate this
tip." -- B.P., via e-mail
"Were a busy
family, so each week the dinner menu is posted on
the fridge in a plastic paper-holding sleeve.
Behind it are the recipes or instructions for
that weeks meals. Whoever gets home first
gets things started. That person also pulls
anything that needs to be defrosted for the next
meal. It has worked to help everyone do their
share." -- P.L. in Ohio
Another busy family tip:
"On the door from our garage to the house,
my husband used both magnetic paint and
chalkboard paint. Its the door we use most
to come in, and we write notes to one another
there." -- K.S. in Wisconsin
Childrens art can
be used in many ways: laminated as a place mat,
temporary bookmark, stationery for family members
or decoration for gifts (when cut and pasted onto
plain-color wrapping paper).
Go Green Tip: When
cooking, use the size pot that fits the burner,
or the burner that is the best size for the pot.
A 6-inch pot on an 8-inch burner wastes more than
40 percent of the burners heat, according
to the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency.
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Publishing. All rights reserved.
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