today's laugh
I want to get some ice cream — will you lend me a
dime?
I’m giving you this dime because it makes me happy
to do it.
Why don’t you give me a quarter and really enjoy
yourself?
He was so vain that he had his X rays
retouched.
Customer - "Why do you have
magazines with stories of murders, mysteries, and ghosts
on that table there?"
Barber - "Well, it makes the customers’ hair
stand on end and makes it easier to cut."
"Why are you running a steam
roller over that field?" asked the stranger.
"I’m trying to raise mashed potatoes,"
explained the farmer.
1900
INTERESTING MELANGE.
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
CIRCUIT COURT TODAY.
A damage suit on bond, being the case
of G.A. Hann vs. C.B. Oxendine and others was taken up
this morning before a jury. It is a case in which
Oxendine, a saloonkeeper of Webb City, is sued on three
counts, making a total of $150, for selling intoxicating
liquors to the son of the plaintiff, who is a minor.
Curry & Rooney are the attorneys for the plaintiff
and Geo. Booth and E.O. Brown, represent the defendant.
The case of Calkins & Son vs. E.W.
Johns, being a suit on a $312 note, was next taken up.
Mr. Johns claims that he signed the note as president of
the Buennatura Oil Co., and not as an individual, and
that the company only should be held responsible. A jury
had been selected this morning, when the plaintiff filed
a new petition, and the defendant followed with an
affidavit of surprise, securing a continuance.
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Today's Feature
All Day Celebration.
The City of Carthage and donations from several
local businesses will provide a full day of
activities for tomorrow’s July 4 celebration
in Municipal Park.A 5K
run and 1 mile fun walk will lead off the
activities starting at 7 a.m. At 9 golfers will
start a 3 person scramble in the Red, White and
Boom Golf Tournament.
Live entertainment will be
featured beginning at 10 a.m. and continue until
the fireworks display begins at approximately
9:35 p.m. Local and regional entertainers will
include various styles of music, magic, clowns,
and puppet shows.
Arts and craft vendors and food
concessions will be available during the day.
The Kiwanis Kiddie Amusement
Rides will be open from 1 p.m. until 6 p.m. and
five adventure courses will be open from 2 p.m.
until 7 p.m.
The fireworks show will have
approximately twice the number of displays as
compared to recent years. The City appropriated
$20,000 for the event and local contributions
added approximately $16,000. Additional
expenditures are expected to be offset with
vendor and participant fees.
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Just Jake
Talkin'
Mornin',
Used ta have a dog that
would start shakin’ all over and hide
behind the couch whenever it started to
thunder. No talkin’ to that dog. Just
wouldn’t listen.
No matter how calm we
spoke, or how much we petted that dog, it
wouldn’t move from it’s security
furniture.
I don’t suppose it
really hurt anything that the dog was so
fearful of a rumble or two. There was
somethin’ that made us kids want to get
the dog to face the thunder.
‘Course we were
prob’ly lucky not to be struck down by
lightnin’ durin’ some of our
adventures durin’ rain storms.
I suppose now there would
be some dog shrink tellin’ us that we
could somehow work the animal through its
fears and make it a more functional pet. The
dog lived a normal and healthy life.
Sometimes you just have to let shakin’
dogs lay.
This is some fact, but
mostly,
Just Jake Talkin’
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Workman's Loan
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Weekly Column
The Super Handyman
by Al Carrell and
Kelly CarrellQ: I
have stripped the wallpaper from my kitchen wall,
which I want to paint now. What do I need to do
to the wall surface to make it smoother and ready
for paint?
A: Most painted walls
are less likely to show joints and other
imperfections if they are textured, so we
recommend texturing. It is pretty easy to do.
You can get a nice stippled
effect by applying drywall compound with a short
napped paint roller . There are some rollers made
just for the chore.
There are many other ways to
texture a wall. A wall coverings dealer should be
able to give you other ideas, or you can check
out decorating books at a library or bookstore.
Once you’ve textured the
wall, you can prime and paint it.
If there are any stains on the
wall now, cover them with white shellac or a
sealing primer before texturing and painting.
Q: We had a burst pipe
in the basement this past winter, and it caused a
flood. Now we have a water mark about an inch up
on the wooden paneling down there. Before
investing in molding to put all the way around
the room, is there a way to remove theses stains?
A: If the paneling is
painted, spray on a primer coat that is made to
seal in water spots and then repaint.
If the paneling has a finish
such as varnish or lacquer, try buffing the water
stain with a mild abrasive that isn’t dry.
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Copyright 1997-1999 by Heritage
Publishing. All rights reserved.
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