today's
laugh A collector of
rare books ran into an acquaintance who told him he had
just thrown away an old Bible.He mentioned that
Guten-somebody-or-other had printed it.
"Not Gutenberg?" gasped the
collector. "Yes, that was it!" "You idiot!
Youve thrown away one of the first books ever
printed. Maybe worth half a million!"
"Oh, I dont think this book
would have been worth that much," replied the man.
"It was scribbled all over in the margins by some
guy named Martin Luther."
A newsboy was standing on the corner
with a stack of papers, yelling,
"Read all about it. Fifty people
swindled! Fifty people swindled!"
A man walked over, bought a paper. What
he saw was yesterdays paper.
The man said, "Hey, this is an old
paper, wheres the story about the big
swindle?"
The newsboy ignored him and went on
calling out, "Read all about it. Fifty-one people
swindled!"
1909
INTERESTING MELANGE.
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
A SERIOUS ACCIDENT.
Yesterday afternoon Martin Chenoweth, a
well known carpenter of this city, met with a very
serious injury. He has been working for some time in
Carterville, superintending the construction of the Edgar
mining plant. Yesterday afternoon an iron buck-stave,
weighing about 300 pounds, which was standing near where
Mr. Chenoweth was working, tipped over and the upper end
falling about ten feet, struck him on the head, crushing
his left temple against a beam and breaking the
skullbone.
Mr. Chenoweth was brought directly to
Carthage for treatment, not losing consciousness at any
time, and submitted to a trephining operation, having the
loose bones removed and the depressed portions raised.
The operation, which was performed by
Drs. Brooks, Ketcham and Freed and lasted about two
hours, was eminently successful, and Mr. Chenoweth is
apparently resting easy today.
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Today's Feature Council Filings
Close.
The period that candidates
could file for City Council and Mayor ended
Tuesday evening at 5 p.m. The following
candidates have filed and will appear on the
ballot in April.
Ward 1: 2 year term: Claude
Newport (incumbent)
Ward 2: 2 year term: T. J. Teed
(incumbent)
Ward 2: 1 year term: No one has
filed
Ward 3: 2 year term: Debbie
Carter John Studebaker (incumbent)
Ward 4: 2 year term: Mike Riley
(Larry Ross, incumbent, is not running)
Ward 5: 2 year term Brent
Greninger (incumbent); Ron Wells (former Council
Member when he lived in Ward 2)
Mayor: 4 year term: Mike Harris
Mike Harris is currently
holding the seat in Ward two that no one has
filed for. Since he is technically still in
office until he becomes mayor, he is unopposed,
he will nominate his own replacement. The
appointment would then have to be approved by the
City Council.
NASCAR THIS WEEK
By Monte Dutton
Sponsored
by Curry Automotive
Elliott Sadler
Returns to Ford
Elliott Sadler is trying to
recover from a long slump.
In 2004, he finished ninth in
the Sprint (then Nextel) Cup point standings.
Sadler hasnt made the Chase since,
spiraling to 13th in 2005, 22nd in 06, 25th
in 07, 24th in 08 and 26th last year.
This year Sadler, 34, returns
to Ford, and though its part of an apparent
merger with Richard Petty Motorsports, he also
will return to Yates Racing. Two of his three
career victories were with Yates, and all three
were in Fords.
"Were building new
cars, trying to get everything as prepared as we
can, so when we leave to go down for the 500, we
have our Vegas and Atlanta and California (next
three races) cars and all the stuff done,"
said Sadler. "Its been great so far.
Im very much looking forward to getting
back in a Ford.
"I feel like I had a lot
of success when I drove for Mr. Yates early in
his engine program. I have a lot of respect for
Doug Yates, what theyre doing. Itll
be neat to get back in a Ford again. ... Im
very happy about the things that weve
learned from the Ford camp and kind of put in the
things that we were already doing. Were
already a little bit more optimistic, it seems
like, week by week, before we get to
Daytona."
While appearing in Nashville,
Tenn., at the Sprint Sound and Speed festival,
Sadler paid tribute to the winner of the past
four Sprint Cup championships, Jimmie Johnson.
"I have a lot of respect
for him and his race team," said Sadler,
"but I dont see them just laying down
and giving up the crown to anyone. Youre
going to have to go outrun them and do that week
in and week out.
"Ive heard Mark
Martin say many times, even being their teammate,
he didnt realize how good Jimmie and Chad
(Knaus, the crew chief) were until he got on that
side of the shop and got to see what they do week
in and week out.
"I mean, I dont know
about handicapping the sport. Im not into
that. But Im saying right now, I would
think, my opinion, hes going to be the car
you have to beat when it comes down to Homestead
(final race) again."
***
Monte Dutton has covered
motorsports for The Gaston (N.C.) Gazette since
1993. He was named writer of the year by the
National Motorsports Press Association.
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Just Jake
Talkin'
Mornin',
I grew up hearin and
usin the phrase "thats
corny." The term was typically used to
describe a "corny" joke, or in some
instances a person that either told corny
jokes or just acted corny. Im
sittin here tryin to define the
term without tellin a corny joke. I
suppose its like ya hear, "I
cant describe it, but I know it when I
see it."
In school, there was always
a corny teacher or two, tryin to tell
jokes or be humorous. The kids would laugh
and this would only encourage more corn. It
was a vicious circle. Usually the term
wasnt intended in a harmful way, just
matter of fact like, just accepted. The truth
was, most folks seem to enjoy a little corn
now and then, speakin of the verbal
kind of course, and that aint chicken
feed, pop.
This is some fact, but
mostly,
Just Jake Talkin.
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Sponsored by
Metcalf Auto Supply |
Weekly Columns CLICK and CLACK
TALK
CARS
Dear Tom and Ray:
I am a valet at a local country
club in Wisconsin. As you well know, it gets very
cold here in the winter months, and that leads to
my question. As a favor to the members who choose
to valet park with me, I like to warm up their
cars before they leave. I let the cars run
anywhere from two to 15 minutes, depending on how
long they take to get ready to leave, get their
coats, finish conversations, etc. So my question
is: Am I doing any damage to these automobiles?
Would they be better off next winter driving away
in ice-cold cars? - John
Ray: Youre not harming
their cars, John. The only harm youre doing
is wasting gasoline. And since theyre all
paying exorbitant dues to belong to a country
club, theyre probably not worried about gas
money.
Tom: In the old days, when cars
were carbureted, you COULD do harm by warming up
a car for too long. In warm-up mode, a carburetor
would pour lots of gasoline into the cylinders,
and the excess gasoline could run down into the
crankcase and dilute the oil. And the rich
mixture could ruin the catalytic converter, too.
Ray: But modern cars meter
their gasoline into the cylinders so precisely,
with the help of computers, that they can idle
for days without a problem. This was proven in
Princeton Universitys famous "Police
Cars in Front of Dunkin Donuts" study
from 2003. And 2004. And 2005.
Tom: So, in terms of the cars
themselves, youre doing no harm. And
Im sure your customers appreciate getting
into a warm car and having heat immediately.
Ray: The only downside is the
extra pollution created by these long warm-ups.
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