today's
laugh A man called
the church office one day and said, "Can I please
speak to the head hog at the trough?"
The secretary, highly offended, said,
"If you mean the pastor, then you may refer to him
as Pastor or Brother,but you may
certainly NOT refer to him as the head hog atthe
trough!"
The man said, "Well, I was
planning on giving $10,000 to your churchs building
fund, but..."
"Hold on," the secretary
quickly replied, "the big fat pig just walked
in."
If you can count your money, you
dont have a billion dollars. - J. Paul Getty
The journey of a thousand miles begins
with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.
Its always darkest before dawn.
So if youre going to steal the neighbors
newspaper, thats the time to do it.
1909
INTERESTING MELANGE.
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
MANY VISITORS NEXT
WEEK.
Word being received by local Degree of
Honor members indicates that the coming state meeting of
that order in Carthage on Tuesday and Wednesday of next
week will be a big affair. Some 75 or 80 delegates are
expected to be present and many visitors besides,
swelling the number to several hundred.
Two carloads of people have signified
their intention of coming from Galena and Pittsburg
promises to send over 100 people on a special train. Both
those towns will be represented by finely drilled teams
which will appear at an entertainment to be given free at
the Grand opera house on Wednesday evening. Views
representing the principles of the order will also be
shown by an electric lantern to be brought here
especially for the purpose.
The meeting of the convention during
the day time will be held in the Masonic hall.
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Today's Feature City Financially
Strong.
The following is an exerpt from
the City of Carthage Annual Audit.
"The managements
discussion and analysis of the City of Carthage,
Missouris financial performance provides an
overview of the Citys financial activities
for the fiscal year ended June 30, 2009. Please
read it in conjunction with the Citys
financial statements, which begin on page 14.
Financial Highlights
The net assets of the
Citys governmental activities increased by
$187,629 as a result of current year activities.
The assets of the City
exceeded its liabilities as of June 30, 2009, by
$21.7 million (net assets). Of this amount
$6,012,412 was unrestricted and may be used to
meet future obligations of the City.
Total long-term
liabilities of the City decreased by $344,373.
Overall revenues were
down over 12% from the previous fiscal year.
Interest earnings, grant revenues and sales tax
were the areas with the most significant decline.
Even so, the City remained fiscally strong due to
conservative budgeting."
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Just Jake
Talkin'
Mornin',
Sometimes an asset can
quickly become a liability.
I can remember the
adventure of bein able to ride my
bicycle out in country as a kid. Part of the
fun was seein how many miles could be
traveled in an afternoon. On one of those
five mile or so trips, a tire went flat. Then
I realized both tires were flat. All the
sudden that wonderful machine became a real
burden. Thinkin I couldnt show up
at home without the bike, and knowin I
couldnt ride on a the flat, I pushed.
Now walkin a bike on
pavement with the tires inflated is fairly
effortless, but pushin two flats on a
gravel country road becomes a chore after a
couple a miles. Ive learned to carry
patches and an air pump.
This is some fact, but
mostly,
Just Jake Talkin.
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Weekly Columns
THIS IS A HAMMER
By Samantha Mazzotta
Prepping for
Spring
DEAR HAMMER: Hope youll
print my tip. Over the winter, I save some of the
cold ashes from my fireplace -- enough to fill a
legal paper-size plastic storage box. (Make sure
the ashes are completely cold before removing
from the fireplace. You should be able to put
your hand in them and not feel any heat.)
Thats plenty enough for my size yard.
Putting too many ashes in the
compost can cause problems with the
composts pH balance, so I keep them
separated. Come spring, once the flowers and
shrubs have bloomed, I sprinkle a thin layer over
the soil around the plants (being careful not to
let the ashes touch the stems). This little bit
of ash provides extra nutrients for the roots,
and seems to keep slugs away, too. - Harry B. in
Little Rock, Ark.
DEAR HARRY: Thanks for the tip!
This reminder that spring really is around the
corner is pretty timely, as homeowners should be
getting their outdoor tools and furniture ready
for the warm season. Its been a tough, cold
winter across the U.S., but believe it or not,
its ending soon.
Now is the time to get that
lawnmower fixed and sharpen the blades of cutting
tools. Put a fresh coat of all-purpose oil on the
metal parts of garden tools and make sure hinges
and other moving parts move smoothly. Check
wooden and plastic handles for damage and repair
or replace them.
In late February, if your part
of the country does not have snow on the ground,
you can start de-thatching and seeding bare spots
in the yard. Leave shrubs tied up or covered
until all danger of a hard frost is past.
Outdoor furniture and grills
should be opened up, checked for damage, cleaned
and made ready for spring. If your grill sat on
the deck outside all winter, take the cover off
and check for rust, pooled moisture or damage
from debris strikes.
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Heritage Publishing. All rights reserved.
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