today's
laugh A guy shows up
late for work. The boss yells "You should have been
here at 8:30!"
He replies: "Why? What happened at
8:30?"
A construction site foreman had 10 very
lazy men working for him, so one day he decided to trick
them into doing some work for a change.
"Ive got a really easy job
today for the laziest one among you," he announced.
"Will the laziest man please put his hand up."
Nine hands went up.
"Why didnt you put your hand
up?" he asked the 10th man.
"Too much trouble," he
responded.
1910
INTERESTING MELANGE.
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
Electric Car Loaded With
Picnickers Struck by Lightening.
A crowd of young people chaperoned by
Mrs. C. O. Harrington and Mrs. Mansur, of Covington,
Kentucky, picnicked at Lakeside park last evening. The
ladies went out at 5 oclock and were followed by
the masculine contingent an hour later.
An elaborate picnic supper was spread
in the pavilion at 7 oclock, after which the
remainder of the evening was spent in boating on Center
creek and dancing in the pavilion.
The party came in on Conductor
"Deacon" Smiths car and his
"hoodoo" prevailed sufficiently to cause the
trolley wire to be struck by lightning. The car was just
this side of Morgans switch when the bolt struck.
The trolley wire was burned into and Motorman Josh Baker
was quite severely shocked. When the trolley wire parted
the lights in the car of course went out and left the
crowd in darkness.
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Today's Feature Where the Money
Goes.
From the 2010-2011 City Budget
Document approved by the Council Tuesday.
The General Fund Budget will
allow all departments to provide service levels
at or near the same level as the previous fiscal
year. Based on the Budget Ways & Means
Committee recommended budget for fiscal 2011, the
projected ending fund balance for the General
Fund will decrease to approximately $2,774,167.
This amount includes the three months operating
reserves for emergencies of other approved
expenditures. Additionally, expenditures exceed
revenues by approximately $421,300. Capital
expenditures account for approximately $401,593
and are essentially funded through the
accumulated fund balance. For the 1995 fiscal
year, a policy was established to maintain a
minimum fund balance equal to 33.33% of the
General Fund annual operating expenditures
excluding capital improvements. In Fiscal year
2000, the Budget Ways & Means Committee
revised that amount to a recommended 25% which
was approved by the Council with the adoption
ofthe budget. This year a 25% level is again
being recommended.
NASCAR THIS WEEK
By Monte Dutton
Sponsored
by Curry Automotive
Timing May be
Right for Earnhardt Jr.
BROOKLYN, Mich. -- In terms of
the Chase for the Sprint Cup, Dale Earnhardt
Jr.s forecast isnt too dour.
Following a respectable seventh-place finish at
Michigan International Speedway, Earnhardt is
14th in the standings, just 81 points out of
"Chase position," meaning the top 12.
Hes ahead of two drivers,
Ryan Newman and Jamie McMurray, who have won
races this year. In terms of expectations,
however, Earnhardt is having another difficult
year. He has more fans than anyone else in
NASCAR, and they expect him to win multiple races
and championships.
The expectations may be
unreasonable, but they come with the territory of
being the son of a seven-time champion.
Asked what he had to say to his
fans about the latest race, Earnhardt said,
"Hopefully, they enjoyed (the) good run, and
I hope that I can bring more of them to them,
man. Weve just got to have a good car, but
with the way these races go at the end,
youve got to have a ton of luck, too, to
make a lot of right calls and have the best car
at the end.
"But youve got to
put a good car on the race track, and Lance
(McGrew, his crew chief) has done that the last
two weeks ... real good cars."
The timing just might be right.
The regular season has 11 more races, affording
Earnhardt ample opportunity to reach the top 12
for the Chase, which consists of the final 10
races.
Earnhardt has been in the top
12 after seven of the 15 races in the season to
date, five of them in a row at one point.
Earnhardt began the season
impressively, finishing a fast-closing second in
the Daytona 500 after making a breathtaking
charge that fell just short. The Michigan finish
matched his best performance since, equaling a
seventh-place finish at Bristol. He also finished
eighth at Texas, the site of his first Cup
victory on April 2, 2000.
"This is the kind of run
we want to have," he said after the Heluva
Good! 400. "We can do it. The guys taking
(the car) to the racetrack have just got to get
it right.
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Just Jake
Talkin'
Mornin',
Seems ya never really catch
up to reality. Talk of "moderate"
housing that costs $60-$80,000 still seems
odd.
I can remember the folks
frettin bout bein able to
afford the $63 a month payment on our small
three bedroom brick home. The price for the
new house, with a basement was somewhere in
the $13,000 range.
I havent lived in a
vacuum all these years, but when I see
economy cars bein advertised for about
the same money today, I still somehow make
the comparison.
Im not makin
some pitch about things bein better or
cheaper back then. It just always jolts the
senses tryin to get a handle on the
reality of value.
Course it still
shocks me ta see penny candy goin for a
dime these days.
This is some fact, but
mostly,
Just Jake Talkin
.
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Sponsored by
Metcalf Auto Supply |
Weekly
Columns
CLICK and CLACK
TALK
CARS
Dear Tom and Ray:
With all the news about
uncontrolled acceleration, my wife has decided
that she wants to be prepared in case it ever
happens to her. We know the proper thing to do is
shift the automatic transmission into neutral. To
get practice in this maneuver, she has been
slipping the car into neutral while shes
driving. Shell put it in neutral while
traveling at speed, and then let the car slow
down a bit, then pop it back into gear and keep
going. I know this is a good thing for her to
know, but its starting to drive me nuts. Is
it OK for the transmission? Its coming
close to an argument for us. Can you tell me if
what shes doing is OK? - Mike
Tom: is she doing it five times
during every trip to the convenience store? That
may be grounds for a domestic dispute.
Ray: but if shes doing it
only occassionally, just forget about it.
Its not going to do any damage to the
transmission.
Tom: If it is a very frequent
occurence, then you need to appeal to her on both
humanitarian and safety grounds.
Ray: On the safety side, you
dont want her to be so focused on
unintended acceleration that someday shell
be practicing her coasting in neutral when she
suddenly needs to accelerate to get out of the
way of another vehicle.
Tom: Right. You never know what
kind of accident you may be involved in, so you
dont want to be so obsessed with one kind
that you inadvertently increase the likelihood of
another.
Ray: On humanitarian grounds,
youll just have to tell her that its
driving you ape-dung. Suggest to her that perhaps
her "shift to neutral" practice could
safely be reduced to, say, once a month. Good
Luck Mike.
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Heritage Publishing. All rights reserved.
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