today's
laugh Bob was in his
usual place in the morning sitting at the table, reading
the paper after breakfast. He came across an article
about a beautiful actress about to marry a football
player who was known primarily for his lack of common
knowledge and his fairly low IQ.
He turned to his wife Marlene with a
look of question on his face. "Ill never
understand why the biggest jerks get the most attractive
wives."
Marlene replies, "Why thank you,
dear!"
A lady noticed her husband standing on
the bathroom scale, sucking in his stomach. Thinking he
was trying to weigh less with this maneuver, she
commented, "I dont think thats going to
help."
"Sure it does," he said.
"Its the only way I can see the numbers."
Sign at Los Angeles dance hall: Good
clean dancing every night but Sunday.
1910
INTERESTING MELANGE.
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
Horse Thief Caught at
Sarcoxie.
This afternoon Marshal Stafford
received a telegram from the marshal at Sarcoxie to the
effect that Bill Martin who stole Judge Hornbacks
horse and buggy from a hitching rack in this city was
under arrest there. Marshal Stafford will go over this
evening to get the prisoner.
Mrs. J. S. Williams, her two daughters
and son, Mack, left this morning for Colorado City,
Colorado, where they go to make their future home. Mr.
Williams who is a contractor and builder, has been in
Colorado for some time arranging for the coming of his
family. Mack Williams has for several years past held a
position on the Press as carrier, devil and typesetter,
successively, as is an excellent young man - faithful,
capable and, trustworthy. The Press is sorry to lose him
but wishes him abundant success in his new home.
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Today's Feature Proposed New
Fireworks Ordinance.
The City Council Public Safety
Committee submitted the following ordinance to be
considered in second reading at tomorrow
nights Council meeting. Section 10-3
referred to generally forbids the discharge of
fireworks in the City limits. This ordinance
would allow fireworks during these dates.
"SECTION I: Chapter 10 of
the Carthage Code is hereby amended by adding the
following new section thereto: Chapter 10,
Article I, Sec. 10-4: Exceptions
The follow shall be exceptions
to Sec 10-3: (a) December 31st from 5:00 p.m. to
January 1st at 1:00 a.m.
(b) June 30th to July 3rd from
9:00 a.m. until 11:00 p.m. each evening.
(c) July 4th until July 5th
from 9:00 a.m. until 1:00 a.m.
(d) July 5th from 9:00 a.m.
until 11:00 p.m.
(e) Nothing in this section
shall allow the discharge of any firework in the
Municipal Park at any time.
(1) The Fire Chiefshall have
sole discretion of suspending Section 10-4 of the
City Code in times of high fire risk or
drought."
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Just Jake
Talkin'
Mornin',
I think there are more than
a few out there that want this fireworks
discussion to be over. Not because they care
one way or the other whether explodin
fireworks in the city is legal, they just
want me to stop talkin about it.
Tomorrow night is scheduled
to be the end of the discussion, unless the
Council decides to postpone the vote.
Hopefully the members have a real sense of
how the community feels. Thats really
what all this chatter has been about all
along. If the majority of the citizens want
legalized fireworks in the city, then so be
it. I just dont happen to think that is
the will of the people.
Ive heard and read
local opinions that tend to support that
thinkin.
This will be the first
close call for many on the Council, it will
be interestin to see how the vote goes.
Ill let ya know.
This is some fact, but
mostly,
Just Jake talkin.
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Weekly Columns THIS IS A HAMMER
By Samantha Mazzotta
Old CDs Find New
Life in Garden
Q: A friend passed on this tip
to me, and I want to pass it along to your
readers. I like to start my backyard garden from
seeds rather than planting seedlings, but birds
are a problem as they fly in and eat the seeds
before they sprout. To combat this, my friend
told me to put my old, unused CDs to work.
Place stakes all around the
garden perimeter -- and up the middle if need be
-- and string sturdy twine along the stakes,
wrapping once around each stake to keep it level.
Then, run a short piece of string through the
center of each CD and tie them to the perimeter
string so that they dangle between the string and
the ground.
The reflecting, shimmering
light and spinning CDs frighten off birds.
Ive had a lot more success this year
getting plants to sprout and get established! --
Sara F., Glens Falls, N.Y.
A. Thanks, Sara. Thats a
pretty brilliant way to reuse old CDs! Keeping
birds away from seeds -- whether garden
vegetables or grass -- is an annual challenge,
one that novice gardeners and experienced
landscapers alike must often face.
Heres a few other ways to
discourage birds from nibbling away at freshly
sown or planted seeds:
For small garden plots
or spots on the lawn being patched, place stakes
in a square around the perimeter and tie string
along the perimeter and crisscrossing over the
area. Tie strips of old cloth every 9 inches or
so.
Large areas where seeds
have been sown -- such as several feet of bare
lawn -- can be covered with a layer of dry straw,
which lets water in but discourages birds and
other creatures from getting at the seeds.
Hang wind chimes at the
edge of garden plots. The sound sometimes alarms
birds and pests and keeps them away.
Finally -- and this might not
be practical in your neighborhood -- but my
mother placed her clothesline right next to the
garden. She hung out washing several days a week,
and rarely had trouble with birds coming around.
HOME TIP: When planting
seedlings, place a flattened paper bag or cloth
sheet next to you and put excess dirt onto it, so
the dirt can be moved easily and wont cover
up other plants.
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Heritage Publishing. All rights reserved.
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