today's
laugh I went to the store the other day, and I was in
there for only about 5 minutes. When I came out there was
a police officer writing a parking ticket.
So I went up to him and said,
"Come on, buddy, how about giving a guy a
break?"
He ignored me and continued writing the
ticket.
So I called him a pencil-necked geek.
He glared at me and started writing
another ticket for worn tires!
So I called him a piece of horse
manure.
He finished the second ticket and put
it on the windshield with the first. Then he started
writing a third ticket!
This went on for about 20 minutes...
the more I abused him, the more tickets he wrote.
I didnt care. My car was parked
around the corner.
I try to have a little fun each day.
Its important
1910
INTERESTING MELANGE.
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
Still
Looking for His Horse.
Groceryman A. Hughes left this
afternoon to visit William Cadderly, 20 miles northwest
of this city, to see a stray horse that he thinks may be
the one that was stolen from him over a week ago.
Good Both in Quality and
Quantity.
The Arlington hotel feels proud of its
"cuisine" and points to its jolly cook as a
model. He was enticed onto the hay scales yesterday and
tipped the beam at 313 pounds.
J. C. Tuttle is confined to his home
today from overwork, and as his partner in the implement
business, W.S. Shuler, is out of town, Miss Ina Tuttle,
the bookkeeper, is in charge at the Shuler-Tuttle
implement house.
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Today's Feature Web Ads Said to
Promote Illegal Activities.
Missouri Attorney General Chris
Koster has called on backpage.com to close the
adult services section of its classified
advertising website. The letter to backpage,
signed by 21 attorneys general, follows the
successful effort to force craigslist to close
down its adult services section.
"While this office remains
a defender of free speech, organizations like
craigslist and backpage have crossed the line in
allowing advertisements that promote illegal
activity, specifically prostitution," Koster
said. "We cannot allow such websites to be
portals for prostitution in our
communities."
Koster noted that backpage has
been cooperating with the attorneys general, but
yesterday morning called on the company to
permanently remove its adult services section.
Koster is also requesting better policing of the
entire personal services section of
backpages website.
In the letter to backpage,
Koster said, "Because backpage cannot, or
will not, adequately screen these ads, it should
stop accepting them altogether."
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Just Jake
Talkin'
Mornin',
Used ta have a dog that
would start shakin all over and hide
behind the couch whenever it started to
thunder. No talkin to that dog. Just
wouldnt listen.
No matter how calm we
spoke, or how much we petted that dog, it
wouldnt move from its security
furniture.
I dont suppose it
really hurt anything that the dog was so
fearful of a rumble or two. There was
somethin that made us kids want to get
the dog to face the thunder.
Course we were
probly lucky not to be struck down by
lightnin durin some of our
adventures durin rain storms.
I suppose now there would
be some dog shrink tellin us that we
could somehow work the animal through its
fears and make it a more functional pet. The
dog lived a normal and healthy life.
Sometimes you just have to let shakin
dogs lay.
This is some fact, but
mostly,
Just Jake Talkin
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Weekly
Columns
HERES A
TIP
By
JoAnn Derson
When raking leaves, use
this handy-dandy hint: Rake your leaves directly
onto a sheet youve spread on the ground.
Gather up the corners and drag to your compost
area. Or bag most of it, then shake the excess
into a bag using the same gathering motion.
In a pinch, you can use
an old shoulder pad as a "peepee
teepee" when changing a baby boy.
"Protect
candleholders from wax drippings by coating the
inside of the holder with a little petroleum
jelly. But dont do this for tapered
candles, as it could cause the candle to slip
over while lit; use for the bottoms of votives
and such." -- D.R. in Canada
Shower curtains can be
hung inside a regular curtain to insulate a room
from window drafts.
Unwrapped bars of soap
can be used in closets or dresser drawers as
nice-smelling sachets until youre ready to
use them.
"My children love
to help me measure out ingredients when baking
cookies, but they arent all that precise
about getting items in measuring cups. In short,
theres a real mess afterward. I now have
them measure dry goods over a piece of newspaper
and wet goods over the sink. The kitchen is much
cleaner now." -- F.H. in Virginia
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