| today's
laugh A group of friends who went deer hunting
separated into pairs for the day. That night, one hunter
retuned alone, staggering under an eight-point buck.
"Where is Mike?" asked another hunter. "He
fainted a couple of miles up the trail," Mike’s
partner answered. "You left him lying there alone
and carried the deer back?" "A tough
call," said the hunter. "But I figured no one
is going to steal Mike."
A man gave the waiter his order,
"Black coffee, no cream"
The waiter came back and apologized,
"I’m sorry, we’re out of cream. Would you
take your coffee without milk?"
Visiting a genealogist, a man asked how
much it would cost to have his family tree traced.
"It could cost thousands of dollars," said the
woman. "I see. Well, isn’t there an easier way?
A less expensive way?" "Sure," she
replied. "Run for president."
Auntie Em, hate you, hate Kansas,
taking the dog. Dorothy.
When I feel blue, I start
breathing again.
1911
INTERESTING MELANGE.
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
THE DOGS DID IT.
No Game on Week
Days, But a Tempting Plenty on Sunday.
A certain Carthage justice has been
sorely tempted of late. His religious leanings and his
inclination as a sportsman clash so seriously that he has
had a sorry time.
"Why, I can go out to my farm any
Sunday and see more rabbits and quail than you can shake
a stick at, but on week days not a beast of the field,
nor a fowl of the air."
The squire is a good shot, by the way.
Last Sunday he drove out to his farm, south of town, and
started across a field to pick some persimmons and, as he
declares, the dog scared up at least seven rabbits.
"Why didn’t you shoot?" asked a friend who
heard the story told. "Didn’t have any
gun—besides, as you know, I’m a good Methodist
and never carry a gun on Sunday."
Well, to make a long story short, the
rabbits got so thick that there were not holes enough in
the rock fence for all of them, and the irreligious dogs
caught one.
The squire kept on ‘looking for
persimmons’ and a farm hand threw the rabbit into
the buggy, where it was discovered ‘by
accident’ the next day in town. There could be no
harm in finding a rabbit on Monday, so the squire’s
family had that Sunday rabbit for dinner on a week day.
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Today's Feature To The Chief.
Taken from
the Year End Report of the Carthage Police
Department.
Chief Dagnan,
It is once again my privilege
and my pleasure to present to you the Carthage
Police Department Year End Report for 2010. As
always, this is a group effort and I would like
to thank the following individuals for their
assistance; Captain Kaiser, Lt. Hawkins, Sgt.
Dickey, Sgt. Martin, Detective Steffen, ACO
Antwiler, PCO Miller, Secretary Christenson, and
you.
Improvements were made in the
jail with a mug camera integrated into our
reporting software. A DVD providing field
sobriety tests in Spanish along with a visual
demonstration should save us time and money.
Protective cases for patrol car equipment were
placed in each patrol unit and the addition of
the Command Bus has made Special Events such as
Marian Days and Maple Leaf flow as smooth as
ever. Digiticket arrived in August and has proven
to make stops and the tracking of tickets and
warnings much easier, as well as cutting down on
the amount of time an officer spends on the stop,
as well as on the report writing process. Near
the end of the year, the formation of a Color /
Honor Guard
was started and continues to
progress. Sgt. Dickey, DARE Officer Provins and
myself celebrated our thirtieth anniversary with
the Carthage Police Department.
And I think I can speak for all
of us in saying "Thank You" to the
Citizens of the Community, the Elected Officials
we have worked with and our Peers for their
patience and assistance.
This past year was very busy
with over 247,000 Miles driven, 6000+ arrests
made, 10,264 buildings checked with 159 open
doors found, and 846 vehicles unlocked, as well
as all of the "Other" Police work that
was undertaken. We are all looking forward to
2011.
Thanks again!!
Lt. W. D. Barksdale
Administrative Lieutenant /
Patrol Division
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 |
Just Jake
Talkin'
Mornin',
A good rain storm was most
often considered a good sign in the rural
community where I grew up. As long as the
rain didn’t come durin’ harvest or
when the hay was on the ground, it always
seemed to perk up the farmers.
‘Course the farm kids
I went to school with got some relief from
workin’ the fields with a rain, so they
got a little perk themselves. But, the soggy
ground would sometimes lie in wait for the
uninitiated.
A tractor is a strange
machine. It’s capability of pull large
loads is of little assistance when that power
pulls the rear wheels into that mud hole you
were warned not to approach. And when ya have
ta walk back to the homestead and retrieve
the farmer, the "I told you..."
speech follows for years to come.
This is some fact, but
mostly,
Just Jake Talkin’.
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Weekly
Columns
THIS IS A HAMMER
By Samantha Mazzotta
Door Bolt Is Out
of Kilter
Q: Lately I’ve been having
trouble locking the bolt on my back door. I have
to lift the handle up slightly for the bolt to go
all the way. How can I fix this? -- Leonard in
Trenton, N.J.
A: There’s definitely a
misalignment occurring. Either the door is
slightly off kilter, or part of the lock
assembly, the strike plate (the metal part on the
door frame into which the bolt slides), needs
adjustment.
First though, check to make
sure the lock itself works correctly. Open the
door and turn the lock handle to extend the bolt
all the way, then turn it all the way back.
Insert the key in the outside part of the lock
and repeat this action, making sure the bolt
slides easily all the way out and all the way
back in. If there’s any difficulty doing
this, clean and lubricate the lock’s moving
parts.
Next, jiggle the strike plate.
Is it tightly secured to the door frame, or is it
loose? Strike plate screws can work loose or rip
out of the frame wood, particularly if the plate
was tampered with. Tighten the screws if
they’re loose. If they won’t tighten,
remove the plate and reset the screw holes by
tapping a thin wooden dowel (or, ideally, a
wooden golf tee) coated with wood glue into the
holes. Trim away the dowel so it’s flush
with the door frame, then drill a new screw hole
in the dowel and screw the strike plate into
place.
Shimming the strike plate also
is possible. Placing a very thin slice of wood
behind the strike plate will pull it forward.
Chiseling out the wood behind the strike plate
will set it back. You also can raise or lower the
plate a few millimeters and drill new screw holes
(you’ll probably have to place dowels in the
old holes as listed above to keep the wood frame
from splitting).
Adjusting the strike plate is
easier, but you’ll still want to check the
alignment of the door. If you have to shim out
the strike plate so far that it’s at an
angle, there’s definitely an issue. Get a
helper or two and lift the door from its hinges.
Position the door so that the bolt hits the
strike plate smoothly and note the change of
angle. Shim the appropriate door hinge (either
the higher or the lower one) on the frame side to
lift or lower the door to that angle.
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