today's
laugh A couple of friars were behind on their belfry
payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise
funds.
Since everyone liked to buy flowers
from the men of God, a rival florist across town thought
the competition was unfair.
He asked the good fathers to close
down, but they would not. He went back and begged the
friars to close. They ignored him. So, the rival florist
hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious thug
in town to "persuade" them to close.
Hugh beat up the friars and trashed
their store, saying hed be back if they didnt
close up shop.
Terrified, they did so, thereby proving
that Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.
"OLD" IS WHEN - Your friends
compliment you on your new alligator shoes and
youre barefoot.
1911
INTERESTING MELANGE.
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
Water Co. Docked for
Bad Hydrants.
The chief engineer reports that the
water pressure of the fire hydrants at the corner of
Macon and James streets; at Grand and Centennial avenues;
on Main street near the college; at the corner of
Garrison avenue and Clevenger street, and at the corner
of McGregor and High streets, is so low that in case of
fire said hydrants would be practically useless. The
pressure could be made good by cutting off the stand
during time of fire and pumping direct into the mains. It
is the understanding that the water company will provide
means to cut off the standpipe when necessary.
It is doubly sure that they will do
something, as the council last night refused to pay the
bill for these hydrants for the past six months and
reduced the water bill $62.50 on that account.
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Today's Feature Jumpstart
Joplin.
PoliticMo-Gov. Jay Nixon
visited Joplin Tuesday to announce
Jumpstart Joplin, a $122 million
program to aid families who lost homes due to the
devastating May 22 tornado.
"Since the May 22 tornado,
we have deployed every available agency and
resource to ensure that Joplin is rebuilt and
brought back to normal as quickly as
possible," Gov. Nixon said at the
announcement at the states resource center
in Joplin. "Ensuring that residents, and
especially families, have access to adequate,
affordable housing is a critical part of that
recovery process."
Nixon said the recovery plan
will happen in two parts the first will be
$22 million to address near-term housing
recovery. The second will be $100 million in
state and federal dollars to help with long term
housing development.
Nixon told PoliticMo
that while the majority of the funding will come
from existing programs, he plans to work with the
legislature to address funding issues as the full
cost of recovery as a result of disasters
statewide solidifies.
Jasper
County Jail Count
196 July 19,
2011
Total
Including Placed out of County
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Just Jake
Talkin'
Mornin',
I hear folks talkin a
lot these days bout building
relationships. We seem ta always want to put
fancy words to simple ideas. Somehow the idea
of havin a neighbor or a friend
doesnt seem like enough anymore. We
gotta make it into somethin
explainable.
Usually if ya think about
it, friends just kinda show up. Sure ya gotta
spend time with em to consider em
a friend, but ya dont have ta spend a
lotta time figurin out how to build the
"relationship."
I think the main reason the
term has changed is people dont get a
chance to be a friend very often any more.
Buildin a fence, gatherin in crops,
lots a things used ta take a group effort
that would bring people together. When ya
work with folks, ya find out pretty quick who
you can count on if ya need somethin
important done.
This is some fact, but
mostly,
Just Jake Talkin.
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Weekly
Column
HERES A TIP
By
JoAnn Derson
"Rather than using
shelf paper in my pots-and-pans cabinet, I have
lined the shelves with carpet scraps. There is
less noise when I am getting a pot out or putting
clean pans away." -- P.O. in New Mexico
Keep a spray bottle of
full-strength white vinegar by your laundry area.
Use it to spray the underarms of shirts that have
deodorant stains on them.
"Our family
vacationed at the beach this summer, and we
learned a really neat trick to keep sand from
getting inside the house so much. We got a small,
inflatable baby pool and set it up near the
entrance, along with a chair and towel. The kids
dipped their feet in the baby pool, rinsed off
their legs and then dried off. The pool was less
than $5, and it made a big difference." --
N.N. via email
After washing and drying
thoroughly, wrap an iron skillet in wax paper to
store.
When arranging fewer
flowers in a large-mouth vase, use clear tape to
create a grid across the opening. Then, you can
arrange your stems in the holes. It gives some
support to the stems, and the arrangement will be
evenly spaced and very pleasing.
For new vining plants,
use a simple clothespin to guide the vines to a
trellis. Be sure to remove it as soon as the
plant has attached itself, as it will grow
stronger if it has to hold its own weight.
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Publishing. All rights reserved.
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