| today's
laugh Psychiatrist: Congratulations, Mr. Young.
You’re finally cured of your delusion. But why are
you so sad?
Patient: Wouldn’t you be sad if
yesterday you were the President of the United States and
the next day you were nobody?
Teddy: I went riding this morning.
Betty: Horseback?
Teddy: Oh, yes. He got back two hours
before I did!
You can tell there is a generation gap
when a teenager drives his car into the garage and runs
over his father’s bicycle.
I have to talk to my girlfriend every
day on the phone. My husband says, "Why do you have
to talk to her again today? You just talked to her
yesterday. What could you possibly have to tell
her?" "Well, for one thing, I have to tell her
you just said that."
Rebecca: Am I the first girl you have
ever kissed?
Paul: Now that you mention it—you
do look familiar.
1911
INTERESTING MELANGE.
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
Two Real Estate
Deals.
Rev. Ira Gray today sold his home place
at the corner of Mound and Meridian streets to his son
Howard for $900 and the former has bought back for $800
the house and lot next door east which he formerly sold
to Mr. Miller.
Mr. and Mrs. Ira Gray will move to the
latter place as being better suited in size to their
needs. Howard Gray will rent out the house he has
purchased.
A. B. Saltzman, living on Oak street,
has received word that his brother, Joseph Saltzman, now
living in Cleveland, O., received serious injuries a few
days ago. He was riding a bicycle at a very high rate of
speed down one of the asphalt boulevards there, when he
collided with a carriage and fell, breaking his nose and
badly injury his head.
.
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Today's Feature Maple Leaf
Queen.
(See Photo in today's Latest
Issue PDF)
Ann Flanigan
Daughter of Matt and Tracy
Flanigan
In addition to playing the
violin, which she did as her talen, Ann is a
dancer. She is a member of the Carthage HS Royal
Tigerettes Football, Basketball, and Competition
Dance Teams.
She would like to become a
novel weriter and currently attends Carthage High
School.
Jasper
County Jail Count
? October 10,
2011
Total
Including Placed out of County
|
 |
Just Jake
Talkin'
Mornin',
I admit it, sometimes I
actually get movin’ in the car before I
latch up my seat belt. Although I don’t
feel comfortable any more with out the
harness, when I forget I usually wait
‘till the first stop sign and then
buckle up.
On a couple of occasions
(they seem to know) I’ve approached a
law enforcement vehicle before I got to that
first stop sign. Since I really don’t
want to be fumblin’ with the belt as I
pass the officer, I have been known to calmly
pull the belt across my chest and hold it
until I am out of view or reach a
stoppin’ spot.
I’ve seen t-shirts
with an image printed across the chest to
look like a safety belt. Doubt that would
keep your head out of the windshield however.
This is some fact, but
mostly,
Just Jake Talkin’.
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Carthage Printing |
Weekly
Column
HERE’S A TIP
By
JoAnn Derson
• Using your fireplace?
Try adding citrus peels to the logs for a nice
aroma. They can be a good starter material as
well.
• Those hide-a-key rocks
can be a little obvious -- at least they are to
me. I have a spare key hidden outside too, but I
sealed mine in a plastic baggie and buried it in
a spot known only to our family members. Also,
it’s not right by the door. -- I.E. in
Mississippi
• When closing up our
cabin for the season, we brought a box of
mothballs and scattered them around the porch
perimeter. This keeps small animals like mice and
skunks from setting up shop there while no one is
around. -- S.F. in Pennsylvania
• Now’s a great time
to start weatherstripping! Check and recaulk
windows. Caulk along baseboards to deter drafts.
Add insulation to electrical outlets and under
sinks around plumbing. Seal it up to stay toasty
this winter.
• Remember to turn off
bathroom fans after 10 minutes. In the winter, if
your house is on the dry side, don’t use the
fan at all: Open the door so the humidity from
the shower or bath reaches into the house.
•"To remove the skin
from salmon, I freeze it and skin it while
frozen. The skin comes off much easier, and I
waste less of the fish. I buy a large piece and
parcel it into several smaller pieces, since
itŐs just me. I like salmon, and it’s
healthy for me!" -- L.A. in Florida
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Publishing. All rights reserved.
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