Today's Feature

Election Results.

The official results for the April 4 Municipal election were released at 8:45 p.m. on the evening of the 4th.

The Carthage R-9 bond issue was approved by 64.79%. Those who voted in favor of the issue totaled 2,423 and those against totaled 1,317. The approval of the bond issue authorizes the construction of a new high school building.

Michael Goolsby and Lee Elliff Pound were elected to serve as members of the R-9 board of education. Pound received 2,139 votes and Goolsby received 1,962 votes.

In Carthage City Council elections, for two year terms, Cynthia Curry defeated Jackie Boyer for Ward 3 representative. Curry received 214 votes and Boyer received 165.

Unopposed Council candidates were approved in the following Wards: Claude Newport, Ward 1, 172 votes; Larry Ross, Ward 1 unexpired 1 year term, 172 votes Mike Harris, Ward 2, 157 votes; Bill Johnson, Ward 4, 608 votes; Tom Flanigan, Ward 5, 437 votes.

James G. Woestman, unopposed, was elected Mayor of Carthage receiving 1,710 votes.

Stench Report:
Wednesday,
4/5/06

No Smells

I suppose the same folks that make toothpicks branch out into other fields such as match sticks and maybe even pencils.

In Army C rations they used ta have a little wood tooth brush of sorts. Ya chew on it for a while ta make it soft and then used it ta brush your teeth.

I suppose they still make those flat toothpicks. I’ve always preferred the round ones. The main advantage of course bein’ you’ve got two pickin’ ends. Twice the picks for the same money. Course I can see the advantage of the flat ones if you’re on a boat, they don’t roll off the table.

This is some fact, but mostly,

Just Jake Talkin’.

My son told me that using the emergency brake to turn in the snow will not damage the car, and, of course, he believes that it is a better way to turn. He went into a long diatribe when I questioned the method (he is a lawyer and business consultant). My question: Was he damaging my car while using this method of turning? And should I drive like that? Interestingly enough, my son said, "When you ask a mechanic about this, make sure that you say the roads are fully snow-covered." Though I have not noticed changes in my Sunfire, the nagging feeling I have in my mind remains. - Lolita.

TOM: You must have a large estate, Lolita. Because you’re son’s trying to knock you off. Either that, or he’s got a Jim Rockford complex.

RAY: He’s suggesting that when the roads are snow covered, you approach a turn, turn the steering wheel and then pull up on the parking brake. That locks the back wheels and causes them to skid. So, the car slides sideways, and when it gets completely sideways and is facing the direction you want to turn in the first place, you release the parking brake and keep driving.

TOM: Will this do any damage to the car? No. Not until you hit a tree.

RAY: This is positively idiotic, Lolita. Fun, perhaps! But for a guy to suggest that his mother do this? What’s wrong with this kid? Oh, wait. You already told us. He’s a lawyer and business consultant.

TOM: There’s absolutely no good reason to do this, Lolita. What’s his argument? That he’s saving the brakes? Making them last 30,002 miles instead of 30,000? This is not a good idea, Lolita. You need to step in, as this boy’s mother, and tell him to cut it out.

RACING
By Greg Zyla
Sponsored by Curry Automotive

Amato Still Holds Top Fuel Record

Q: Did Joe Amato ever drive a Funny Car? I say no; my friend says yes. Who’s right? -- Chad K., California

A: Joe Amato did compete in an alcohol Funny Car early in his career in the sportsman ranks, but never a fuel Funny Car in the pro ranks. So, for the sake of answering, I’d say you are right, because an alky Funny Car isn’t a professional nitro Funny Car by any means. Heck, even I’ve driven a Funny Car (gas-powered from 1976-80), but I wouldn’t put myself up there with John Force!

As for Amato, before becoming Top Fuel’s leading national event winner, he raced several alcohol-powered Funny Cars, his most popular being the Gabriel Shock Absorber Hi-Jacker in 1977. However, he never won a national event in a Funny Car.

After switching to an alcohol dragster in 1978, Amato won his first national event in 1979 in the Pro Comp class at the Gatornationals in Florida. He scored again at the 1980 Le Grandnational-Molson in Canada, and in 1981 he won three national events with the alky digger. That wrapped up his sportsman racing career.

Amato then made the leap to professional nitro Top Fuel dragster in 1982, where he finished sixth in the standings.

Amato retired at the end of the 2000 season after enduring serious back and detached-retina problems from the tremendous g-forces on those 4-second, 330-mph runs.