today's
laugh
Salesman: I'm sorry sir, I just dropped
this clock on the floor.
Store Owner: Did it stop?
Salesman: Certainly. You didn't expect
it to go through to the basement, did you?
If Dad can remember so many jokes,
With all the details that mold them,
Why can't he recall, with equal skill,
How many times he's told them?
Sign on a broken soft-drink machine:
"Beware! This machine is coinivorous!"
One employee to another
employee:". . .and when the boss' son starts working
here tomorrow he'll have no special privileges or
authority. Treat him just as you would anyone else who
was due to take over the whole business in a year or
two."
Happiness is a form of courage.
1899
INTERESTING MELANGE.
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
Geo. Whitsett's
Company to Sail.
Orders have been issued for the 32nd
regiment volunteers, to prepare for sailing to Manilla on
September 21, 1899. George P. Whitsett of this city, is
first lieutenant of company I in this regiment, and will
leave with the regiment.
A Broken Arm.
Robert Corley, the 7-year-old son of
Jno. W. Corley, of south Maple street, was thrown from
the back end of a delivery wagon on the corner of Main
and Macon last evening, breaking his arm between his
wrist and elbow. Dr. Flower was summoned and reduced the
fracture and the little lad is as comfortable as possible
under the circumstances.
J. F. Richardson and May Hay, both of
Webb City, were married by Justice T. M. Garland
yesterday afternoon at five o'clock.
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Today's Feature
Mayor
Disagrees.
The announcement by the
Carthage Chamber of Commerce that Board of
Directors meetings will be closed to the
public and the media has met with mixed
reactions.
"I disagree with
them," Mayor Kenneth Johnson told the Mornin
Mail Friday after a new conference at the
Chamber headquarters. Johnson attended the event.
"Why are they afraid to
have open meetings?" Johnson asked. "It
makes it look like they are trying to hide
something."
The City of Carthage
appropriated nearly $90,000 to the Chamber for
various contracted activities for next year.
Johnson says this amounts to at least a third of
the organizations budget. In addition, the
State and the Joplin Convention and
Visitors Bureau will provide matching funds
that adds nearly 70,000 more tax dollars for
tourism promotion to the groups overall budget.
The recently completed audit
showed an annual unrestricted revenue of the
Chamber to be $212,570. Expenses for management
and general services were $118,374 for the fiscal
year ending June 30, 1999. Membership dues
accounted for $90,353 in revenue for the year.
Graphic Art Opportunities
Due to our recent
purchase of additional equipment and expansion of
our Carthage, Missouri facility, we are currently
taking applications for the following positions:
Press Operator.
Must have experience operating an A.B. Dick 360,
Chief 117, Heidelberg windmill, power cutter, and
folding equipment. Dark room and layout
experience.
Bindery:
General bindery, padding, stitching, booklet
assembly and binding. Some lifting involved.
Pick
up an application at 213 Lyon, Carthage,
Missouri, or call for appointment. 417-358-5174
Fax 417-358-3168 email: mmail@morninmail.com
Carthage
Printing Services
"Latest
technology, Old fashioned values."
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Just Jake
Talkin'
Mornin',
They say that the worst
thing about a cow bein at the back of a
line is that the view never changes.
Course the good thing is ya dont
have ta do much thinkin as ya wonder
through the pasture.
I probly heard that
story from some motivational speaker at one
time or another over the last twenty years.
Looks like theyd come up with an
original way to illustrate the point.
I suppose theyre like
most of us, we get used to ploddin
along the path and dont really wanna be
bothered ta change. Even if the view
isnt that great.
Ive walked a few cow
paths. No matter where ya are in line, you
still have ta watch your step.
This is some fact, but
mostly,
Just Jake Talkin
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Sponsored by
Workman's Loan
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Weekly Column
the Super Handyman
Dear Al: I love the new grill
my kids bought for me. I cleaned it up really
well before I stored it for the winter. In the
process, I discovered I had a couple of rust
spots to remove. With no rust remover, I tried
cider vinegar as a substitute and was amazed at
how well it worked. I let it sit on the rust
spots for several hours, and when I washed it
off, the rust was completely gone. It was
certainly less expensive than the commercial
product. I have painted these areas now and
stored away the grill. Just thought I would let
you in on my money-saving secret.
Dear Al & Kelly: Miniblinds
might be a good way to keep the sun out of your
home, but they are a pain to clean. At least they
were until I discovered an easy way to do it. I
let them all the way out, then close them and
take them down. Next I lay them on my driveway
over a bedsheet and spray them with some
household cleaner, using a string mop to scrub
them down. Then I rinse them off. You have to be
gentle with them, but my method gets them really
clean really fast. I usually hang mine on the
fence to dry, but you don't have to. You only
have to clean miniblinds once or twice a year,
but my method is much easier than some of the
other suggestions I've heard.
We like hanging them from a
clothesline and using detergent in a hose-end
sprayer, attacking the blinds from both sides. We
bring them in once they're dry.
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