today's
laugh
A nitwit is a person who tells you the
first half of a joke, pauses to laugh for a few minutes,
and then forgets the punch line.
Carl: What's that you have in your
buttonhole?
Earl: Why, that's a chrysanthemum.
Carl: It looks like a rose to me.
Earl: Nope, you're wrong. It's a
chrysanthemum.
Carl: Spell it.
Earl: K-r-i-s. . . by golly, that is a
rose.
To make a smile come, so they say,
brings 15 muscles into play.
But if you want a frown to thrive
you have to use some 65!
Did you hear about the fellow who
stayed up all night wondering where the sun went? It
finally dawned on him.
1899
INTERESTING MELANGE.
A Chronological Record of Events as they have
Transpired in the City and County since our last Issue.
Carthage Men
Interested.
Ira A. Williams, of Mineral Springs,
who had secured a lease on 100 acres of land along Sugar
camp, has interested Nate and Harry Ogden, Jesse Scott
and Henry Kelm, all of Carthage, and the company is
prepared to contract for a 50-foot shaft to be sunk at
once. If 50 feet does not catch what they want they will
go down at least 100 feet. The company means business,
and after preliminary investigation feel that they have a
good prospect.
Teachers Examined.
County Superintendent E. B. Denison
yesterday afternoon held his first examination of
teachers under the new institute law which went into
effect this month. Those taking the examination were
Frank R. and W.O. Burns, of Medoc; Joppa Mason, of Webb
City; I. F. Nickell, of Carthage, all for first class
certificates.
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Today's Feature
Failure to Communicate.
Four past and one current
employee of the Carthage Chamber of Commerce
gathered on the Square across the street from the
organizations headquarters yesterday evening
expecting a meeting with the Chamber Board of
Directors. A written request for such a meeting
had been submitted on September 1, 1999, asking
to discuss current and past management practices.
The door to the Chamber offices was locked and
nobody was home. The group, along with up to five
members of the media, lingered until after 6:30.
When told of the gathering, and
the expectation of a meeting, Chamber President
Dexter Friesen said he didn't know where the
group was getting their information. The
Executive Committee did meet at another location
to review the recent audit report.
According to former Chamber
Board member Dan Corp, who officially resigned
his post as a director last Friday, the Board's
failure to acknowledge similar concerns he has
raised prompted his resignation. Former Board
President Edie Swingle Neil resigned April 29,
1999 after a meeting in which Neil, in her
resignation letter stated, had "strong and
bitter words directed at me."
Graphic Art Opportunities
Due to our recent
purchase of additional equipment and expansion of
our Carthage, Missouri facility, we are currently
taking applications for the following positions:
Press Operator.
Must have experience operating an A.B. Dick 360,
Chief 117, Heidelberg windmill, power cutter, and
folding equipment. Dark room and layout
experience.
Pre Press:
Experience with Pagemaker, Quark, Photoshop,
Illustrator, Coral Draw. Design and typesetting.
Mac and PC. Four Color process experience a plus.
Customer Rep:
Need strong organizational skills, computer
skills, and be service oriented. Knowledge of
current paper trends and printing background.
Bindery:
General bindery, padding, stitching, booklet
assembly and binding. Some lifting involved.
General Office:
Phone skills and computer skills. Experience with
Quickbooks, Excel, Access and page layout
programs.
Pick
up an application at 213 Lyon, Carthage,
Missouri, or call for appointment. 417-358-5174
Fax 417-358-3168 email: mmail@morninmail.com
Carthage
Printing Services
"Latest
technology, Old fashioned values."
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Just Jake
Talkin'
Mornin',
I can remember the
conversation with my older brother, prob'ly
twelve or thirteen at the time. I don't know
what it was about, but he was agreein' with
my folks about somethin' that I didn't agree
with.
I made some statement about
'em gangin' up on me. Why couldn't anyone see
things the way I did?
He said somethin' about
takin' a minute to at least consider the
possibility that if ever'one was agreein' but
me, maybe, just maybe I was wrong.
Like I said, I don't
'member what the topic of conversation was,
but mostly likely he was right and I was
wrong. It happened on occasion. I doubt that
I ever admitted that to him though. I would
have never heard the end of it.
This is some fact, but
mostly,
Just Jake Talkin'.
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Sponsored by
Carthage Printing Services
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Weekly Column
PRIME TIME WITH KIDS
by Donna Erickson
Its a mystery to me how
the juice glasses I bought only a few months ago
have already lost their lustre and now look like
something discovered in an archaeological dig -
aged and etched by the sands of time! If you have
a collection of clouded drinking glasses too,
disguise their foggy appearance with patterns of
intensely-colored tissue paper to create festive
votive candle holders. Its an enjoyable
craft for preschoolers and adults alike.
Use old or new sturdy, plain,
glass, juice or water drinking glasses. Squeeze
white household glue in a small bowl diluted with
a few drops of water to create a milkshake-type
consistency. Brush a coat of the glue mixture on
the outward side of a glass. Apply various
one-inch strips, squares, circles or triangles of
colored tissue paper in an overlapping pattern
over the glue. Use tissue paper cut in
interesting shapes such as a flower, fish, leaf,
too. You may find it easier to apply the glue and
tissue paper a section of the glass at a time,
especially if you are working with younger
children. When covered, apply another coat of the
glue mixture over all of the tissue paper. Let
dry for several hours. When dry, the tissue paper
will look bright and colorful once again.
Place a votive candle inside
the decorated glass. At dinnertime, an adult may
light the candle to create a soft glow.
Your children might be so
enchanted by the stained glass effect of their
creations, they wont even notice you are
serving leftovers!
VARIATIONS: Glue small,
colorful pressed flowers and leaves to the glass
before applying the tissue paper. Look for tissue
paper with printed designs and cover the glass
with one cut-to-fit piece.
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Publishing. All rights reserved.
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