Did Ya Know... Friends of the Library Book Sale will be Sat., Dec. 6 from 8 a.m. to noon.

Did Ya Know... Institute of Counseling Prayer will have an open house today from 4 to 6 p.m. at the Commerce Executive Suite, 211 Main, Suite 305 in Joplin.

Did Ya Know... Ongoing tutoring is available in skill building Mon. through Fri. 8 a.m. to 2 p.m. and Tues. and Thurs. from 7 p.m. To 9 p.m. For information, call the Family Literacy Council at 358-5926.

Did Ya Know... The Salvation Army needs bell ringers. To volunteer your time, call 358-2262.

A man wanted to arrange for the disposal of a $5000 bond, so he called his bank.

"Sir," said the clerk, "is the bond for redemption or conversion?"

After a long pause the man said, "Well, am I talking to the First National Bank or the First Baptist Church?"

Sweater: A garment worn by a small child when his mother feels chilly.

Dad: Did you use the car last night?

Son: Yes, Dad. I took some of the boys for a ride.

Dad: Well, tell them I found two of their lipsticks.

Prof. E. E. Dodd To Wed Miss Clara Riley.

Prof. E. E. Dodd, of Chicago, and Miss Clara Riley, of this city will be married at 5 o’clock this afternoon, at Colorado Springs, Colorado.

The bride is a daughter of S. S. Riley, of this city, a prominent horticulturist and president of the county horticultural society. She is a young lady of great attractions and amiable disposition, a graduate of the Carthage high school and has been employed as a stenographer by the Cowgill & Hill Milling Co. She is prominent in Congregational church work and is one of the most esteemed young ladies of Carthage.

Prof. Dodd was for ten years Principal of the Carthage high school and presided over it when his bride of today graduated. He is a scholarly gentleman of highest attainments and has warm friends in Carthage. He is a stockholder in the Wells & Wiggins Wholesale Grocery house and holds the office of treasurer of that corporation.

I guess if folks understand what you’re talkin’ about, it doesn’t really matter that what your sayin’ doesn’t actually make any sense.

I’ve always thought the term cat fishin’ was a little misleadin’. ‘Course the same is true for ice fishin’, and pond fishin’ I suppose.

Then there are those expressions like sky high and low down. I guess just one word isn’t sufficient to express the extreme of high or low.

Vice President Gore, talkin’ ‘bout the internet, said some regulation would prevent kids from bein’ "harmed or hurt." I suppose just preventin’ ‘em from bein’ one or the other wasn’t enough.

It’s prob’ly not reasonable to assume that we humans would always say exactly what we are thinkin’ or really mean, ‘specially considerin’ how much most of us talk. We all take short cuts like "cat fishin’" when we know they’ll be understood. ‘Sides, if ya have to explain it, you’re prob’ly in the wrong conversation.

This is some fact, but mostly, Just Jake Talkin’.

by Metcalf Auto Supply.

Click and Clack Talk Cars

Dear Tom and Ray:

My wife has a 1991 Buick Skylark that seems to be overly plagued by problems. Most recently, at 34,000 miles, the timing chain broke. The car was towed to a local Buick dealer. They said the cause was "poor maintenance," and they refused to cover it under the warranty (which was about to run out). They also stated "we’ve had experience with tensioner problems under poor maintenance conditions."

I disagreed on the poor maintenance. When they removed the valve cover to show me the camshafts weren’t turning, I expected to see lots of old oil crud. But there were only four or five semi-solid globs, all smaller than a medium-size screwdriver blade. All the drain ports were very clean, and no crud was visible on any of the parts. What do you think of their diagnosis? Chilton’s manual mentions an "old" and "new" tensioner. Was the old one a problem? - Milton

Ray: Your repair slip tells us that you have GM’s infamous "Quad 4" engine. And our Buick source says they’ve redesigned the tensioner for this engine several times, largely because they can’t stop them from breaking. And, he added, this engine has been nothing but trouble.

Tom: No matter how poorly you maintained this car, it’s almost impossible for you to be at fault for a broken timing chain at 34,000 miles. They usually go 134,000 miles - at least.

Ray: I’d get in touch with your Buick Zone Representative and ask if Buick won’t reconsider reimbursing you and covering this repair under warranty. Unless they can prove that you’ve somehow abused this engine, I think you’d have a very strong case. Good luck, and even though they tried to pull a fast one on you, start by being polite - it’s much more effective.